Top 10 ‘Truly Tasteless’ Dick Cheney Heart Transfer Jokes
I got a bit bored last night, so took to writing/Tweeting some Dick Cheney Heart Transfer Jokes.
Yes, some are not very good. And unfortunately, the best ones are entirely inappropriate, but hey, the guy’s a war criminal, so spare me the outrage.
Here they are (in 140 characters or less):
10. Hope Dick Cheney pulls through. Don’t want him evading justice that easily.
9. Dick Cheney will live to torture us another day.
8. When I said before that Dick Cheney was heartless, you though I was kidding around.
7. Haven’t listened to Chris Matthews in months, but I predict he lectured his viewers tonight that it’s pronounced Cheenie, not Cheney.
6. To allow 71 year old war criminal to cut ahead in long waiting list (where children get priority), anonymous donor was secretly a chimp.
5. With five heart attacks already under his belt, Cheney feels new heart may give him an edge in topping the all-time record.
4. Poor Dick feared he’d shot his last friend in the face.
3. Anonymous donor turned out to be Liz Cheney. She’d had it on ice for well over a decade.
2. If I’m David Gregory, I don’t wanna be eating any Scottish Haggis at Liz’s house, unless she can show me her father’s in a jar.
1. 5 heart attacks and a heart transfer, and he’s still here? It’s as if Hell won’t even have anything to do with him.
BONUS: Amnesty International told doctors, in advance, if they were to accidentally forget to administer the anesthesia, even they’d look the other way.
Thank you! **bows** Thank you! Thank you! **bows again**
1. Dick Cheney went into heart surgery bitching about Iran. He emerged from surgery vowing to conquer world poverty.
2. They attempted to grow Cheney’s heart using his DNA & stem cells in petri dish, but it kept turning to shit.
3. We still got Dick Cheney to kick around.
FELT I SHOULD ADD: Before anyone feels too sorry for Dick Cheney, remember that he made nearly $8 million from Halliburton stock option appreciation just between the years 2004 and 2005, due to the Iraq War, which he mislead us into.
In that war, hundreds of thousands of innocent Iraqis lost their lives, thousands of U.S. troops lost their lives, 2 million Iraqis lost their homes and became displaced.
Dick Cheney tortured people, around 100 of which died from torture.
Dick Cheney feels no remorse. He says he would do it all again: the Iraq War, the torturing, everything…
He is estimated to be worth around $100 million, walking the streets a free person (despite all the calamity he has caused), and he even gets to appear on the MSM whenever he wants, to weigh in on current events, and continue his fear mongering.
Since he is unlikely to ever face justice for his crimes against humanity (and his profiteering from it), the least we can do, is poke some fun at him on the heels of his successful surgery, that so ironically involved his ‘heart.’
Former Justice Dept. Chief: Obama Gave Bush Officials ‘A Get Out of Jail Free Card’
In an exclusive interview with Brad Jacobson for The Raw Story, a former acting Justice Department chief J. Gerald Hebert (who served the DOJ in various positions between 1973 and 1994), had this to say about the Obama Administration’s failure to hold public officials to account:
“It’s one thing to want to appear like you’re above the political fray and your cases aren’t motivated by politics,” Hebert pointed out. “But it’s another to not hold people accountable and to not bring justice.”
He also said that running the Justice Department in such a manner sets a “dangerous precedent.”
“Bush and Cheney are not above the law,” Hebert concluded. “Whether it’s the president, the vice president or any federal office holder who violates the Constitution or federal law, or there are serious allegations suggesting that such violations may have existed, then the Department of Justice has a duty and an obligation to fully investigate that.
“And if there are no consequences to any of the actions that violated the federal law in the last administration, then why would anybody think that they would ever be prosecuted for doing it in the future?”
The entire article can be read HERE.
Fox News Legal Analyst, Napolitano, Says Bush And Cheney Should Be Indicted
Ralph Nader appeared on C-Span2’s Book TV with Fox News senior judicial analyst, Andrew Napolitano, to discuss his new book, “Lies the Government Told You”.
For all the differences between ‘Naderism’ and Ron Paul’s brand of conservatism — which Napolitano subscribes to — they are clearly on the same page when it comes to government accountability. In this exchange, Nader and Napolitano discuss Bush and Cheney’s violations of Habeas Corpus:
Napolitano: … What President Bush did with the suspension of habeas corpus, with the whole concept of Guantanamo Bay, with the whole idea he could avoid and evade federal laws, treaties, federal judges, and the constitution was blatantly unconstitutional, and in some cases criminal.
Nader: What’s the sanction for President Bush and Vice President Cheney?
Napolitano: There has been no sanction except for what history will say about them.
Nader: What should be the sanction?
Napolitano: They should have been indicted. They absolutely should have been indicted. For torturing, for spying, for arresting without warrant. I’d like to say they should be indicted for lying, but believe it or not, unless you’re under oath, lying is not a crime — at least an indictable crime. It’s a moral crime.
Nader: So you think George W. Bush and Dick Cheney should — even though they’ve left office — they haven’t escaped the criminal laws. They should be indicted and prosecuted.
Napolitano: […] the evidence … is overwhelming, when you compare it to the level of evidence required for a normal indictment, that George W. Bush, as President, and Dick Cheney, as Vice President, participated in criminal conspiracies to violate the federal law, the guaranteed civil liberties of hundreds, maybe thousands, of human beings.
It’s rather encouraging to hear this coming from a guy who often fills in for wing-nut Glenn Beck, when the host is away.
Ann Coulter’s Favorite Democrat, Harold Ford, For New York Senate?
I’ve been watching former Tennessee Congressman and bank executive Harold Ford Jr. as a contributor on MSNBC for some time, and this guy has always struck me as the typical finger-to-the-wind beltway insider. You know, the status-quo politician — always looking to spew the beltway establishment talking points, proud to be far to the right […]
Obama’s Betrayal Of The Left Spells Problems For The Democratic Party
Back when Candidate Obama was working the campaign trail across the country, his message of hope — of overcoming entrenched interests in pursuit of meaningful and necessary change — inspired and stirred a nation. He marketed his message in an ingenious mantra, “Yes we can,” that conjured up the spirit of Martin Luther King Jr.; […]